Ta-da! Here I am with another post, with another crazy load of rants, to tell you that my day is as imperfect as yours. After becoming a mother, the days are long, so long… that it never seems to end. When life and the mundane chores drive me crazy, coke helped me to gain balance again.
I wouldn’t call coke anything else, but my coping mechanism when I wanted to hide in bathroom for hours because I couldn’t take the stress anymore.
“Give birth to kids, they said. It will be fun, they said…”
Every day is the longest day once you become a parent. After the kids retire to bed at night, the sofa is the heavenly abode for any mother. Sitting in her comfortable pyjamas, holding a glass of coke, and watching my favourite series on Netflix without any interruption is my version of a fairy-tale.
I know coke is carbonated sugar, thanks to Google, but the fitness freaks I know in my life never stops to remind me how I am destroying my health. A moment of relief and relaxation turns to annoyance and irritability with all the uncalled bits of advice.
It is okay, people, to hold on to something when you seem falling. It is called a coping mechanism. For a mother, there is no return to normal, ever in her life. By binge-watching a series once-in-a-while with coke in hand, I try to make myself feel normal.
When you see all the ways how coke destroys my physical health, you fail to see how it improves my mental health. All the anxiety and blues suddenly goes away, and I feel relaxed with a gulp down the throat.
So, here is an ode to my favourite drink of all-time:
With the onset of the moon and the lights dimmed, the night brings calmness and warmth to my soul. The silence around me assures that I have this moment all for myself. I love her, and I love how she clings to me all day. I also love how I could sit, stand, and sink into any profound thoughts without anyone bossing me around.
Adele sings, “…sometimes, it lasts in love, and sometimes, it hurts,” on the music player, melting me down to my knees. I break down for no reason or various reasons accumulated over every single day. With tears dripping down my cheeks, I pour myself a glass of Coke, which touches the brink of my white porcelain mug. The cold cup soothes me in ways I cannot describe.
I raise the toast to myself for doing well today. I didn’t burn the waffle. I didn’t yell at my daughter when she wasted the food that I spent two hours preparing for lunch. I didn’t lose anger over the supervised moments I got to spend in the loo. I did amazingly well, and I deserved this.
I switch off the lights, and in complete darkness, I take a sip of coke and close my eyes, curling up on the sofa. There the song slowly drifts from Adele to Marshmello, and the lyrics go like this:
When you’re high on emotion
And you’re losing your focus
And you feel too exhausted to pray
Don’t get lost in the moment
Or give up when you’re closest
All you need is someone to say
A deep sigh of relief escapes from my lips. I take another sip and thank the Coke for retrieving my sanity today. There are little things like this in your life to say, “it’s okay not to be okay.”
It doesn’t have to be a person necessarily. It could be music, a shower, or a drink. Don’t let anyone dictate what could be your coping mechanism. Live life your way, and don’t apologize for it. It is a brand new day.
You can love your kid and still want to have some alone time without them. It is not cruel or inhumane. When your child goes berserk and your day starts slipping, what do you do to take a break? Share us your thoughts and the coping mechanisms you follow in the comment box below.
See you in another rant session. Until then, bye-bye and boop.